Had a post in mind for today...I think it was about vitamins. Yes I was going to say that I found the whole thing incredibly stupid, because I believe in the natural order of things, and since our universe managed to swing it so that the atmosphere was breathable, the strong and weak nuclear forces were exactly balanced in order to create and maintain life, and the Earth lacked a species of malignant giant superbug that would crush humanity in the pincers of its shiny titanium exoskeleton, I think it can handle putting enough Vitamin B12 in my fucking food. Also, I worked at GNC for a few months one summer, and know what? They are LAUGHING at you. You and your chromium picolinate and your women's one-a-day. Eat a fucking apple, you fucking moron.

But I'm not going to bother posting about that, because I found this, and it's so funny it overshadows anything I could possibly say. Go read.

Dear germs,

I am so frigging sick of catching every single one of you that wanders down the pike. You glom onto me like I'm some sort of fucking magnet. Go ahead, you bastards, chalk the mark on my back. I've got the Consumption. I'm going to the Crimea, to eat fresh fruit. Fuck this, and all of you.

Yours sincerely,


Bleah

How. The fuck.

I couldn't even put together the little car-thing.

Read the whole thing, and then go back and laugh at the irony of number 4. NOTE- apparently the moron who posted this decided it might be a good idea to pull it, but yay! Consumerist is keeping it alive- here.
It's nice to see stereotypes validated. Mcdonalds employees really are a pack of stupid illiterate bitches incapable of doing the exact jobs they were hired to do. Observe the face of surprise!
I'm in a terrible mood today so I'll just say, I really hope her boss finds this and the bitch gets fired. Service with a smile, my shiny metal ass. God I hate America.


Also, there's....this.... I do not understand. Is the child going to live under the desk? Or is it just maybe going to sleep there?