The reason I declined to talk about Katrina and such was because that was essentially what we discussed every day in every class last semester. And went to forums at night. And have continued this semester, without actually learning anything new, or any sort of applicable theories. Because that would take time from the weekly current events quizzes she gives us because when she worked at R.J.R. Nabisco many, many eons ago she didn't read the sports page and therefore could not engage in casual conversation with the menfolk. Thus the reason most of us have started bringing liquor to the four-hour Monday night class. Makes you feel a little better when the class that is supposed to tie up everything you've been learning for the past four years and relate it to workable business skills is actually being taught by a batty Hill/Corporate burnout who doesn't need the money but thinks 'teaching would be fun even though I don't really know how to do it and the school only made me chair of the department for my name and sorry I was forty-five minutes late but I was trying on new wigs because I'm bored with my hair/ I just got off a plane from DC so I don't actually have a lesson plan so let's talk about that episode of the West Wing where Bartlet accepted the Taiwanese flag 'by accident' instead of letting you go because you don't have anything better to do at 10:00 on a Monday night.'
Yeah. So that's why I'm not talking about that.
Yay for liquor.

Today I realized what was wrong with America. It's one simple, neat little explanation that covers everything. Won't go into it now, because I'm mentally drained by yet another interminable day of boredom at my Monkey Job, and physically drained from going to a dinner party last night in which there was a lot of wine and humorous chat from my New Gay Friend, whom I have dubbed Devo. See how tired I am? The syntax just there was atrocious.
So tomorrow, or when I get around to it, I'll tell you all what's wrong with America. It probably won't be all that original, but the grammar will be, like, real good.
PS A Dinosaur will be back soon, but she's had a hard time lately, what with all the robberies and muggings. Honestly, that girl is such a crime magnet, she oughta be a lobbyist. Ok. That wasn't quite as clever as I'd hoped. See above re: tired.
PSS What does a gay horse eat? Answer: haaaaaaaaa-aaaay. Heh.

Hmm. Remember how I said we were looking for a way to set our blog apart from all others? Well. We forgot to post for the past…4 months? So have missed Katrina, Fitzmas and more or less every major political or natural development since Novemberish. This makes us Unique. As opposed to lazy.
It really isn’t so much that we forgot to post, but I just don’t have the time- I actually have to WORK at work now, so I barely have time to cram in the daily Outrage Scan of the news every morning. And I spend so much time screaming about things in bars that I can’t be bothered going back and blogging them. This is why I’m not getting paid to write. I should maybe look into changing that.
And as far as my erstwhile other cyberhalf goes, I have no idea what she’s doing. Sleeping with a ballroom dancer, from what I gather. I ask no questions.
So, what’s been going on here, you’d ask, if you cared? I am broke, and yesterday spent $23 on a variety of cheeses. And I bought a $15 bottle of shampoo because the brand was Marc Anthony and the guy who plays him on Rome is hot. Perhaps these things are evidence of my endearingly whimsical eccentricy. But it’s possible that I’m just a terrible, terrible person.
In my head, I’m writing a 20-page thesis about why people are Republicans and why they’re able to do the things they’re curently doing. There will be wit, yea, and there will be pith. If I ever get off my lazy, misbegotten ass, maybe I’ll write it down. But I damn well won’t be putting it here. Not that I don’t love the five of you, but if effort is going to be involved I want a reward. Preferably money. Everyone has a goal, and mine is to loll in a clawfoot tub filled entirely with hundred dollar bills. Stop judging me. Go away.